Catchy Title TBD

I didn't want to call this one "Hacking your HELOC!" Firstly, that's what everyone else calls it. Secondly, I don't have a fucking HELOC because I only put down 10% on my house. (That's what investors DO baby, leverage!) But I am hacking a regular old line of credit. So what does that leave us with?

Lamaze your LOC?
Lick your LOC?
Lock down your LOC? (Too redundant?)

Ooooh, ooooh, I got it!


I love doing stupid little acronyms and word plays. The favorite part of my research is coming up with those fun titles to call a study so everyone's just like, "Yeah, the RaINBoW study showed...." and it's this mess of the first few letters of a bunch of words strung together to just remotely kinda sorta describe what the study did. FAVORITE PART. But I digress.

To make a long story short, I been doing a little research on this bitch, and I think it will work. So typically, people hack their HELOC and pay down their house in five years. I'm going to liquidate my LOC (and by liquidate, I mean spend the fuck out of) my regular old LOC on....*gasp* I'm sure this is so surprising....MY STUDENT LOANS.

I do not know if I have adequately expressed my loathing of them on this blog, but they are the bane of my existence. I financed them, I refinanced all of them, I re-re-financed some of them, and now I'm re-re-re-financing the two remaining largest ones. (Interest dropped more than 1% since last time, I can't help myself.) But the smallest two, I'm paying off via liquidating my LOC and hacking my TSP. Damn, now I want to come up with a catchy name for that. Hm. Maybe next time.

Today I did the LOC transfer and scheduled the payment to almost pay off the loan. (I say "almost" because it's always an estimated payoff because interest is constantly accruing, so I'll schedule the last little tiny one after this big payment posts, because that'll just make life easier. I don't want to get a check in the mail back for $.03.) It's weird because I technically still owe most of that money, just in a different form, but it feels so much better to have the student loan part paid off? I ended that in a question mark because I am asking a question. I know it's weird, and I don't know why it is so, but it is.

If you would like to do a similar thing, there is info out there on the webs about it. Not a ton, and some of it you have to pay for, but a little Googling should do you. One day I may get into the finer details, but since I literally just did it today - I did promise you Dr. Strangelove style here, no? - I'd rather give you the play by play of how it works before I start telling you how to do it, in case it crashes and burns for some unforeseen reason.

To be honest, however, as soon as I started shifting money around, I saw the magic. It's super hard to explain in writing (although oddly, when I called my credit union and asked them questions, I managed to explain what I was doing to the loan officer and she said it was brilliant, I explained it well, and she now intended to do it herself, so...maybe I can repeat that? Maybe it was beginner's luck, ha), but if it really is super duper awesome, I will certainly take a crack at it.

In the meantime, not a lot of rental drama to report this week, I've just been monitoring my vacant unit for vagrants and frozen pipes. (None of either, or else there would be drama to report, duh.) Oh, but I am closing on another one around the end of the month. There will be something then, I am fairly sure.

Alright, let me talk to the vacant space of the internet now...where are y'all at with more...let's say avant happenings such as restructuring debt through hacking your HELOC and whatnot? I find the FI community largely tends to be conservative and this doesn't make sense at first glance, so I'm curious! Tell me, tell me, tell meeeeeeeeeeeee.......

In the meantime, enjoy this picture of Layla letting me know how not amused she is that I'm writing this instead of petting her.


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